WADA Needs a Hero

Two Notes from Fatty: First, I’m going to have to beg for an extra day to do the math on who won the “Get a Grip” contest. Thank you in advance for cutting me the necessary quantity of slack.

Next, I’ve got a new article posted at BikeRadar.com. I want to point out that BikeRadar has been doing something incredibly cool with my articles for the last couple of installments: creating custom illustrations, instead of just going to the ol’ stock art well. You can read a teaser below, or jump to the whole article by clicking here.

WADA Needs a HeroIn the nick of time, a hero arose.
Early this week, John Fahey was selected by the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) Foundation board to replace Dick Pound as its president. He managed to snag this plum job through the extremely savvy technique of being the only person the board had available to choose from.

Frankly, that seems just a little lazy of WADA. Couldn’t they have asked around a bit? Maybe put an ad in the paper or something like that?

No, of course that wouldn’t have worked. I mean, think about it. Ideally, this president needs to do the impossible: eliminate doping while restoring the public’s confidence in  the reputation of both professional cycling and WADA itself.

The fact is, the president of WADA needs to be more than just a mere mortal. This job requires a person with — let’s face it — super powers. And I’m afraid that, unless “Former Finance Minister for Australia” is just his mild-mannered alter-ego, John Fahey just doesn’t qualify.

Any of the following people, on the other hand, would have done nicely:

Wonder Woman: Let’s start with the most obvious candidate. Wonder Woman’s magic golden lasso forces whoever she’s lassoing to tell the truth. This would stop doping cold. Instead of endless blood and urine controls, you could just have Wonder Woman randomly lassoing racers at the start line and asking, “Have you ever doped?”

Not only would this be incredibly effective, it would be awesome pre-race entertainment.

Click here to continue reading “WADA Needs a Hero” at BikeRadar.com.

PS: What hero / villain would you choose as the next leader of WADA? Please post your choice in the comments section of my article at BikeRadar.

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