Eat a Lot of Goats: The Video Game

You know what’s cool? It’s cool to see your kids get really, really good at something.

You know what’s even cooler? When your kids surpass you at something. For example, a few years ago, my son — ten years old at the time — and I started learning Macromedia Flash together. He is now way, way beyond anything I can do with it.

So I recently asked him to do another cartoon for the blog. He, however, was more interested in writing an arcade-style game, using some of the elements from his previous cartoons for the site.

So here it is: Eat a Lot of Goats, starring Bob and me. You can play as either of us.

Need help on how to play? OK, here are the instructions, which my son was kind enough to write.


  • Eat as many goats as you can
  • Don’t lose all of your health!


  • Don’t stay in the explosions caused by the dangerously ugly jersey, or you’ll lose health.
  • Eating said jersey would cause instant death, so avoid that at all costs.
  • Moving offscreen will cause a deer to bounce you back onscreen, and you will lose health.


  • Left arrow key: move left
  • Right arrow key: move right
  • Down arrow key: use tongue to eat goats directly in front of you.


  • Hold down both arrow keys at once to stop quickly.
  • Goats disappear after a while, but you won’t be penalized; another one will just fall elsewhere to replace it.
  • The fresher the goat is, the more points you get for eating it.
  • You can pick multiple goats with one press of the down key if they’re clumped together.
  • Don’t try to eat a goat if a jersey’s too close to it!
  • The closer you are to the center of an explosion, the more damage you take.

PS: Feel free to post your high score in the comments. So far mine’s not worth mentioning.

PPS: Contest tomorrow, with an extra-cool prize: a highly-coveted and hard-to-obtain Ergon BD1 bike backpack!

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