Mugged

A Note from Fatty: Today’s excellent story comes to you from frequent commenter Born4Lycra. I have to say, I am really enjoying all the stories you readers are sending in. Thanks for covering for me! I believe I will make “Readers’ Stories” a regular part of Fat Cyclist once I come back.

I’m wondering if anyone can offer any insight into what happened to me today…and help me avoid what might happen later today.

The Dilemma
I innocently accompanied Dave, a good mate and work colleague to a nearby bike shop (Mike Turtur Cycles Main North Rd Prospect SAust), merely to window shop while he inquired about various bikes across the Pinnarello, Orbea and Olmo range. He went to get prices and possibly buy, while I went for something to do and to spend my lunchtime surrounded by bikes, as well as maybe pick up a few tips, ideas, prices, and so forth for future reference.

My friend’s single, well paid, and loaded. I’m married (happily) and am a proud dad with limited resources.

So why did I leave the proud owner of a new Orbea Venta limited edition 2007 model, while he is still trying to make up his mind between studying, athletics, cycling, golf and soccer?

Love at First Sight
It’s true: I have always hankered after an Orbea — preferably bright orange. You know, the kind of bike that looks fast even when leaning against the wall at the coffee shop. Of course it will look slower if I am in the picture, but I’m willing to live with that.

It’s true: my own bike is close to the bottom of the range of Avanti’s and probably needed updating. However, it was not in my plans to happen this year let alone this day.

Dave and I walked into the shop and Greg Turtur made his way straight for me. So how did Greg know I was vulnerable? Was it the drool? The audible sighs? Or was it just that I looked like a buyer? Regardless, Dave faded into the background — gathering information quietly — while I am directed straight to my fantasy on wheels (which has only been on display for 3 hours).

There were tell tale signs that the purchase was going to happen.

  • I went through the bike fitting process. Only for future reference, of course. 
  • They through me a brand new pair of Euskatel knix to wear during the fitting. Once they were open and used, I may as well keep them. Wow. Thanks!
  • The whole setup was my size. Just lower the seat 15mm and it’s done. Surprise, surprise. 
  • True love. There were heaps of bikes, yet I only had eyes for this one.
  • I bought my wallet with me. Inexplicable really because I usually don’t take it anywhere. No cash in it, just ID.
  • Yes the bike was obviously available for immediate delivery. I could be riding it tonight.

Token Objections
Sure, I tried to resist. Here’s how it went:

Me: “I really like it but I obviously don’t carry that sort of cash around.”

Greg: “No problem, your word is enough for us.”

So now, suddenly, I have an Orbea Bike. Somehow, the fact that it’s not orange doesn’t matter.

So back to my original problem: how did this happen? And more importantly, how I can tell my wife this tale I have just told you?

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