You Know You're Blowing Your Diet When…

  • You fabricate reasons for why you shouldn’t check your weight.
  • You are gaining weight at approximately the rate you should be losing it.
  • You start thinking of the diet as an enemy, and have an eating binge simply to spite that enemy.
  • You have an ongoing weekly weight-loss sweepstakes, and miss the goal weight by five pounds.

Clearly, last week was a massive failure. I’ve got all kinds of reasons why I gained weight instead of losing it — work stress, inability to train because I was helping at Boy Scout camp, uniformly fattening food at said camp — but none of them are valid. First comment w/ email address gets a $100 gift certificate, and the Sweepstakes jackpot gets reset to $25. Pffffff.

Today’s Weight: 177.4. And it’s raining so hard I couldn’t bike to work today. Nice.


  1. Matt

    Don’t go all meow-meow kitty on us. The fact that 99.7% of all other blogs follow that path doesn’t make it a valid model for online writing. Eat some fruit, drink water, and continue to rock-rule-and completely dominate. Or just lay off the salt.Meow meow,mc

  2. Unknown

    well, i’m flummoxed. i have absolutely no idea what meow meow kitty means, but i am not terrified that i am such. meow. see? i hate myself now. that’s just fantastic.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *